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adeyeye New member

Joined: 09 Jun 2011 Posts: 3
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Posted: 2011/06/17, 08:00 Post subject: Relationship after Cheating -Will My Marriage Ever Be the Sa |
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Trying to save your Relationship after Cheating can be very difficult. Most couples that want to save their marriage want to know if the marriage will ever be the same again. They start asking questions like can’t we just go back to how the relationship was before the cheating? Do you think our marriage will ever be the same? Can’t we just go back to how it was before the affair?
The problem is you don’t want to go back to the way the marriage was before the affair. If your marriage was in such great shape to begin with, how likely is it you would be facing the problems you are dealing with right now? Not very likely. If your relationship was so great, then why did your spouse have an affair with another person?
The problem with most couples is when looking back at their marriage they only remember the good times. They remember the happy times only, like the romantic nights they spent together, and all the cherished memories they have together. They don’t want to remember the bad times that led up to the affair.
The truth is you don’t want to go back to how the relationship was before the infidelity. Why would you choose to go back to how it was before the affair if how it was before the affair might have given your spouse the justification or motivation that led to the affair in the first place? Believing that you can save the marriage by going back to how the marriage was before the affair is the worst thing a couple can do. By doing this, you are ignoring the true problems that led to the affair.
If you really want to save your relationship after cheating, then you are going to have to leave the past in the past, and start to move forward with the marriage. The questions that really need to be asked are how do we want our marriage to be in the future? What are we going to do to rebuild our marriage, and how are we going to make it stronger? These are the questions you should be thinking about.
Making a relationship work after cheating is going to take a lot of hard work. Both spouses are going to have to decide to work on this together and do whatever it takes to save the marriage and find the love after cheating. You will have to forget about the past and move forward and work on making the marriage better than ever.
The biggest mistake a lot of couples make is to try to save their marriage by themselves. This is a recipe for disaster. If you truly want to save your relationship after cheating, then you are going to want to get help from a professional counselor, or go to the lord in prayer and seek for his forgiveness and forsake your sinful way. Then go back to your spouse and make a genuine amend.
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